A great deal has been spoken of with regards to the issue of the butt. In the words of the infamous L.L. Cool J in his hit song “Big Ole Butts”, when he said, “Tina got a big ole butt”. Then we have the legendary Sir Mix-A-Lot, who sang about his preference and moral fortitude when he said, “I like big butts and I can not lie”. Lastly, we have words from a little less known gentleman by the name of Bobby Jimmy and his group, “Bobby Jimmy and the Critters” who shared about his personal experience with having a big butt by saying: “I can’t drive because my butts to wide – I got a Big Butt, A Big Butt…Huh!” It’s interesting to note however, that upon looking at the actual definition of the word “butt” ~ it has nothing to do with one’s derriere or buttocks, but rather is used as a slang. I suppose the aforementioned artists would have had a tough time using the appropriate words in their lyrics though, (i.e. “Tina got a big ole derriere”- umm..no)
There are numerous ways in which the word “butt” is referred to in common sayings that perhaps you’ve heard or even said, (and are realistically not even possible), such as:
“I’m freezing my butt off!” ~ Really?
“You are SUCH a butt!” ~ Is that even possible?
“If I sit one more minute my butt will literally fall off”~ Literally?
Then, there are the motivational statements in which the word “butt” was used in my own adolescence by individuals who wished to motivate me, such as:
“Shape up and get your butt in gear!” (Band Director)
“Stop being a butthead!” (Coach Roberts/8th grade PE)
“Quit or I’m going to kick your butt!” (Vivian/my BFF)
Even Brad Pitt was quoted as saying, “Shoving feathers up your butt doesn’t make you a chicken”.
However, though you have before you a wealth of information about butts…I am actually going to talk about an entirely different kind of “but”. This but is defined as being: Used to introduce a statement that disagrees with something just said. You see THIS is the kind of but that causes all sorts of problems in our lives. In fact this but has destroyed friendships, marriages and careers. It has been the cause of suspicion, mistrust, and damaged reputations. Not to mention, it IS the fuel that feeds deep seated resentments.
Here are some examples:
“I apologize for what I said yesterday, but you really had it coming.”
“I’m sorry for talking about you behind your back, but it’s not like you’ve never done it to me!”
“I’m sorry for hitting you, but you really make me mad”
“I’m sorry I lied, but you make me feel like I have to”
“I’m sorry your hurt, but YOU just take things the to personally”
“I was going to apologize, but it wouldn’t do any good because you’re such a jerk”
“I’m sorry I’m not perfect, but neither are YOU!”
Isn’t it amazing how easy it is do this? I mean, I am the first to admit, my but has gotten in the way of getting right with someone many times; Not only that, it has been the number one cause of me failing to take advantage of opportunities to grow and to gain humility. What I have found is that the word but is nothing more than an excuse, or if you will, a way to rationalize, justify or minimize to myself or someone else, my behavior. Let’s face it, we ALL make mistakes and thankfully there is a really easy way out of them, by just saying, “I apologize”. In the words of Benjamin Franklin, “Never ruin an apology with an excuse.” © 2014 Rebecca Balko